From The Mouth Of A Baby

Yesterday mom took me to my other Grandmas house about twenty miles away. I was a good girl on the way, even though I do not like to sleep in the car. I was quiet and let mom drive without distractions. We had fun. Mom took along my swing in the truck in case I needed something to do.

But, my grandma wanted to hold me all the time and then my grandpa came home. Mom was doing wash so we stayed for supper, because dad was going somewhere else for supper. I don’t know what she had, but all I had was a bottle. Then grandpa wanted to hold me and he didn’t want to put me down.

I was glad mom brought along a lot of diapers because I sure did have to go a lot. I guess it was all the excitement. I even had to have my clothes changed once. I bet mom was glad she was doing wash.

We got home late and dad was waiting for us. Then he wanted to hold me. I sure didn’t spend much time by myself today. Everybody had me in their arms. I was glad to be home and I was so tired, I went to bed and to sleep early. Mom knew I would be up early last night and I was.

I am getting along better with the dog, but no so much the cat. I get to sleep with mom and dad at night so I sleep better so that means that the cat and dog are out and I am in. I knew it would not take long before I was the one that got all the attention and the bed. The dog doesn’t seem to mind, but the cat is a little fretful. She will get over it.

I was a real good girl yesterday. I let my mom do some things while I laid under that thing that has toys on it. Then I went in my swing for a while with no crying. I was looking out the patio door at the bright sun and I saw a bird by the window. Then that cat ran into the window trying to get the bird. It is funny. The cat shook her head and laid down.

We went for a walk because mom said it was going to rain tonight and tomorrow, so she wanted to get out and walk for some exercise. What is exercise and why does she want to do it. I didn’t know what she was talking about, but we had fun. We walked to Grandmas house and then to the park.

Dad was tired when he came home from work. But he had some time to play with me and hold me. I love my daddy so much. I miss him when he is gone. Mom and dad had dinner and I sat in my swing and watched them eat. Then I got hungry. I made it until mom was done eating because she put that nook in my mouth again.

We went to bed early last night so dad and mom could watch some television and I must have fallen asleep. I wrote up for a bottle at 3:15 AM.

Yesterday was a beautiful day. It was very warm, but I go to go for a walk with mom and dad. It was called Labor Day. A holiday I guess is what mom called it. I am going to a wedding in a couple of months mom told me. She said there will people there that want to see me. It is far away and we will have to stay in a place called a hotel. She said the dog and cat are going to a kennel, I am glad I get to go along and not to the kennel. The dog is already having anxiously attacks about it.

Dad gave me a bath today while mom watched. It was fun even though he had a problem with my backside. He wanted to flip me over and mom said no, no. She had to show him how to do it so I would not drown in the dirty water. He was a trooper though, he did pretty good. I was kicking my legs and he was getting wet.

After my bath, he dried me off and he was taking his time when all of a sudden I had to pee. Oops. Mom told him he needs to dry me quicker or otherwise dry my bottom half and diaper me quick. Then he dressed me in a cute outfit because we had company coming.

Everyone holds me different. I never know how someone will hold me so I am always prepared to be uncomfortable sometimes. I do like being held so it is okay that some people are clumsy with me. Just so, they do not drop me! I am only a little person and my head still wobbles. Mom said I look like one of those bobble heads. What kind of thing is that to say to your little girl? Geesh.

I can’t wait to get bigger so I can get around by myself. I have to have mom take me everywhere now, but soon I will be able to crawl and walk. Well I guess I have a few more months to go before I can do that, but for right now, I just have to play it cool. I am really excited about getting older and having more fun.

Yesterday I was a little crabby. I was over tired and just did not want to go to sleep. Mom would feed me and I would just sleep while I was eating. Then when I was done, I had to wake up so I would not miss anything. I should have slept more than I would have been happier. Well, that is what mom told grandma anyway.

Grandma came to see me and she said I was getting big. She was holding me and talking to me. She said I was going to be just like my dad when I grow up. I was smiling at her and she thought it was because she was funny. I was smiling because I am going to be like my mom. I don’t want to be like my dad and go to work. I want to do the things my mom does.

I fell asleep fast last night because I was so tired. I slept for four hours. I only woke up long enough to eat and then it was back to sleep. I want to get enough sleep so I can be up all day. Mom always looks better in the mornings when I sleep a lot at night. Dad always looks good because mom said he can sleep through anything.

I might be a little person, but mom and dad still took me to the fair. It was fun for a while until I got hungry and started getting tired and crabby. There were lots of people there and mom was happy because there were hardy any bees. It sure was hot with very little shade. Okay, I know my stroller is a way to take me places, but did they have to stick all this junk in my stroller. They were getting free stuff from everywhere and it had to go in my stroller.

I saw something at the fair that was funny. The show was called Grandpa Cratchet. It was so funny and everyone was laughing. Even people with no kids were watching the show. I liked it because he did a scene with a big dog kissing him and I thought he could have been talking about me. Then there was the cat stealing the treats for all the kids. I can relate to that. I think I will like seeing this again next year.

Then mom and dad took me in the animal barns. Boy them pigs and cows stink. It was the most disgusting smell. Dad said that the pigs smelled kind of like my diapers sometimes. I started crying. I was so insulted. Mom gave me the nook and I was quiet again. I still think my dad should say he was sorry for saying that. I mean I am a little person after all.

Dad was drinking a beer, someone knocked into him, and he spilled some beer on me. Now, I think this was smelly, but he just smiled and wiped it off. I could have used a bath because I then smelled like that beer smell. Mom told dad if she got stopped for driving and the cop would smell beer, they would have to say it was me. Sure, blame everything on me.

After a few hours, we went home. They said we were going back on Monday, but I will have to see if I want to or not. If I am crabby we won’t go anywhere, I just know it. I would like to see that Grandpa show again.

Mom was reading a story about a real life account of a little girl that drowned in a Tampa Hotel pool and she died. She told dad to read the story at a parenting blog and he had tears in his eyes. They both said they loved me and they would never let me go by water without one of them watching me. I think the little girl’s parents must be very sad that she is gone.

I had a good day yesterday. Mom and I walked to the mailbox and then she played bowling on the Wii thing. I was in my swing watching her. She is funny when she tries to throw that thing at the television. I was hoping she would not break my daddy’s television. He would be mad, I know.

Mom put me on the floor under this contraption with things hanging down. The colors are pretty, but what am I supposed to do. Mom was making the things move back and forth. She was having fun and I just watched. Then the big dog laid down next to me and gave me a big kiss with his tongue. Yuk, he needs to brush his teeth. He has bad breath. Mom thought it was so cute. He likes me now.

Then the cat tried to come by me and the dog chased it away. Wow, I might want to keep this dog and make the dog get rid of the cat. It was funny. But, mom told the dog to leave the cat alone. When that dog can hear me talk, I will tell him to get that kitty. I was smiling and mom thought I was smiling at her. But, I was smiling because I was thinking about what I can make the dog do to the cat.

I am going to be a handful when I grow up, mom told dad.

We all slept so well together, so it was no wonder that dad woke up late and that started the hectic day. Mom was rushing around to help dad and I was crying because everyone seemed to forget about me, the do was barking to go out and the cat was hungry and meowing for food. Then it happen. The dog pooped on the floor and the cat jumped up and started eating dad’s tuna off his sandwich while he was cleaning up the dog poop. The horrible sound that cat made when dad found it eating his tuna was so loud. The dog didn’t fair much better. He was sent outside and left at the door begging to come in.

Me, I pooped my diaper and it came out the top of the diaper. Boy, did I stink. Dad was running around looking for more dog poop, but it was me. I was laughing and crying at the same time. Dad couldn’t find it. Mom told dad to just go and she would take care of everything. Dad came and picked me up and what happen next, made mom laugh. When dad picked me up, my tee shirt came up and my poop went all over him.

Dad should have just stayed home, but he changed his shirt and went to work. Mom cleaned me up and gave me a bath. I am used to them now since I seem to poop out of my diaper all the time. Maybe they should buy me some different diapers. This is getting to be a bit embarrassing.

I had my bath, got fed and then mom let the dog in the house. Then mom needed a nap, so I let her take a little one while I laid on her. She was tired from the morning events. I think it was funny, but the clean up was lengthy.

The rest of the day, we just laid around the house. It was a nice day outside, but I think mom was tired. She kept saying that she needed to clean the house, but she never got that done either. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day to clean the house.

Mom and I went to a park yesterday and she held me while were on a big swing. It looks different from my swing and mom had to hold me. Dad went to work today, so mom decided we go meet some her friends in the park. It was fun. There were other big kids there but they did not play with me. I saw a critter. Mom said it was a bunny rabbit. It was hopping around in the park. Then I saw birds flying around. The bird pooped on the kid on the slide. Everyone was laughing and the kid was crying. It was so funny.

I have learned to sleep on my side. Mom lays me down and I roll on my side. No one believes my mom when she tells them that I like to sleep on my side and I can do it all by myself. I am just a fast learner. My dad and mom sleep on their sides and so do I. I might be little, but when they take that blanket wrap off me, I can move.

Well, it finally happened. The cat jumped in the pack and play with me. That cat laid down next to me and watched me sleep. Mom thinks this is so cute. I think it is discussing. A cat in my sleeping area. Well as long as it stays on the side of me, I guess I will not say anything right now. Her day is coming.

The outing today made me tired. I never slept the entire time we were gone. Mom said that I am a day person. She told her friend as long as I sleep at night she doesn’t care if I stay await during the day. She is getting used to me being around all the time I think. When she wants to do something though, I still want to come along.

When dad came home, he played with me. He is funny. He talks funny to me. Doesn’t he know that I can hear how stupid he sounds? I wish he would just talk normal. He sounds so funny. Yesterday was the best day. I was a happy little girl. And I didn’t make to many messes in my diaper. I was pretty proud of me.

I wrote up with a rash on the back of my neck and it goes up to my head. Dad told grandma and she said it would be wise to take me to the doctor just to make sure. She said she never heard of a baby with a rash on their head. Mom and dad took me to a doctor and he said I have a rash. Well, we all knew that before going. He gave my dad a prescription to rub on it.

My belly button thingy fell off and now I have a rash on my head. I have to take a bath every other day and now the newest thing is dressing me in clothes all the time. Mom is always saying “Don’t spit up on your new clothes.” Well, if she is that worried about the clothes, she should just let me wear my jammies. I am so much more comfortable. Dad had off work today because he took vacation.

He said he wanted to get some stuff done around the house. He took the dog for a walk, bought mom a new chair, and got rid of that love seat thing mom and me lay on. Maybe he is trying to tell her not to lay down so much. Mean daddy.

I am getting big and gaining weight so now they think I can go longer without a bottle. I still get hungry in three hours for sure. I like my swing, but I never fall asleep in it. No one can figure me out. Everyone keeps saying that babies fall asleep in the swings. Not me, I stay awake and keep my eye on my mom.

I can see wherever she goes. If she leaves my sight, I let out a loud cry so she comes running back to me. She told dad that I was a little dickens. What name is that now? My name is Alivia. What is a little dickens?

The day was quiet because mom and I just laid around the house. We watch The Price Is Right and some soap operas. Mom even typed on the computer, but she told dad it was hard to type holding me. I laugh when she says things like that. I have her just where I want her.

Now for the cat. That cat keeps coming by mom and me and rubbing on me and mom pets her. That cat is so big and I am still little. Just wait until I get bigger than the cat. I will teach it who is boss. I have plans for that dog as well. Just wait, I am going every day.

It was another early night for us because everyone was tired. Dad was mad again because that convention thing was on television. Lights out for us at 9 PM again.

I was a good girl last night. I woke up twice and then I went right back to sleep. My mom was so happy. Dad said I was such a good girl. Everyone was so happy with me. It is a nice feeling when everyone talks to sweet to me. Even the dog looked pleased with me. I still think the dog is trying to get rid of me, but he is playing it cool in front of mom and dad.

I am a stinker mom said to dad. I don’t know why she said that but, I must have done something. Dad had to go to work, so mom and I got to play outside in the sun. I was in my stroller and mom was playing in the dirt. She was pulling weeds out of the ground she told the neighbor lady. That neighbor lady sure is nosey. She was asking all kinds of questions about me.

I was a good girl outside. Mom was so happy that I was so content. Little kids were coming to see me and other ladies. Everyone always wants to touch me. Why do people do that? I don’t want germs, just look at me and don’t touch. That one boy was dirty. He looked like he rolled in the mud. Mom was laughing at him. I didn’t think it was so funny when he touched me and got me dirty.

We had to take breaks and go in the house so I could eat, but mom would always take me back outside. I even managed to take a few naps. It was the fresh air that made me tired. Mom got tired and we went into the house so she could take a nap. I already took a nap, so I was wide-awake. I don’t think she was very happy. When dad came home, he had to watch me so mom could take a nap.

Mom and dad had supper and then they played a bowling game on television. It was funny watching them. Why do grown-ups like to baby games on television. It was a relaxing night and we were all tired so we went to bed at 9 PM. Dad was mad because he wanted to watch some TV and that Democratic Convention was one. My dad said some bad words and I heard them.

Dad turned off the TV and we went to sleep.